hit a wall in my rewrite/any story except for ones i can't write. waiting for my allergy medicine to hit. so i wrote a one-shot.
* * *
"Cass! Elisa's here!"
I walked out of the bathroom and saw Elisa coming up the stairs. She nodded at me. "Hi," She said quietly.
"Hey," I said smiling a little. "What's up?"
"Nothing," She said. I knew that wasn't true. She always texted me or called when she was coming over. Here she was, so she followed me into my room. "Hey, um, I was thinking..." She started.
I looked at her and sat on my bed.
"Um, you know how you said..." She started again pausing. I had no idea where this was going. I was expecting a conversation about Bennett yelling at her or them fighting. "You said I should try dying my hair, and, I don't know... do you think you could?"
My eyes widened a little. I proposed that as a joke. She would look better with darker hair- but she'd never do it in real life. "Yeah," I said smiling. "Are you kidding? Are you busy today?" I got up.
"No," She said stuttering now. "Well, um, actually tonight I am-"
"What time?" I asked stopping at my door. She paused thinking. "Seven thirty."
"Great," I said. "Three hours is perfect. I've had it done in two." I walked into my bathroom closet pushing out of the way toothpaste bottles and toothbrushes from the dentist visits we were saving for later. I found the really dark brown hair dye I bought once but never returned. Here Elisa was in the mood to do something with herself like dying her hair. If I didn't act fast she'd chicken out.
"I was thinking we could do this-" She said walking in. I already had the box open.
"Sit," I said pushing her onto the closed toilet. She did and I got busy setting up quickly. She started dropping excuses. Never well thought out excuses just small lame ones.
"I was thinking I could just tell Bennett first, like I coudl tonight before I actually did it..."
I went into my room and got a huge t-shirt and told her to put it on. I put a towel on her shoulders. "My mom too, she'll kill me Cass..."
I ignored her. I couldn't believe she had actually come to me asking me to dye her hair. This was a radical Elisa I didn't know. I was actually really excited. I was waiting for this since I met Elisa. The moment she'd snap and pull something like this. Something that was permanent. The job thing- if she actually told her mother- she'd quit or something. Her hair was permanent. I brushed it.
"You're going to look so good," I said to her. And that's what did it.
"Okay," She said. "Just make sure I don't look stupid. I can't miss tonight."
"Why?"
"I'm finally going out with Bennett and his friends." She said quietly. I knew Becky. She was weird, but I had no idea who Bennett was even friends with- or the names of the kdis I saw him with. Elisa knew some of them, I knew that. They always went at her in the halls and at lunch and at Bennett teasing him, but this I guess was new.
"You'll look great." I said. "Head down," I pushed her head down and then I started Elisa's hair transformation.
* * *
She put her phone on speaker and waited. She looked nervous. Not only nervous- shocked with herself. Then: "Hello?" It was Bennett. She was going to be late.
"Hi," She said.
"What's up?"
She closed her eyes a little. "I don't know if I can-"
"You can," I said loudly.
Elisa shot me a look. I had told her to say she was going ot be late. She had talked herself into saying she couldn't make it. "So you don't know if you can, but you can...?" I smiled and listened still putting on the finishing touches.
"I'm going to be late," She said. "I just got held up, and it's a really long story."
He laughed quietly. "What?" He asked.
She was panicking a little now. "How is this even a long story?" I asked rolling my eyes.
"Is that Cass?" Bennett's voice asked.
"Yeah," Elisa said. "Sorry, I have to put this on speaker phone."
"So what happened?" He asked laughing quietly.
She sighed. "My mom and I got into a fight." She said.
I listened carefully. I thought Elisa and her mother were really close. I knew Elisa was telling both of us this but I just listened pretending not to. "And she said I was making stupid choices so I just went out and made another one." She said blushing a little.
I rolled my eyes. "It's not stupid," I said.
"What?" Bennett stopped laughing. "What did you do?"
"She just dyed her hair." I said for him.
He sighed. "Good, I thought it was something bad." He said laughing. "It's okay if you're late. You're not going to miss much. Jonah's got a 'huge story' he wants to tell everyone and that'll take about a half hour."
She seemed a little relieved. "Okay," She said. "I'll call you when I go onto 27."
"What color did you dye your hair?" He asked.
"Purple," I said as a joke.
Elisa jumped in quickly. "Brown," She said.
"Which?"
"Brown," She said. "I'm not crazy yet."
He laughed. "Is she lying Cass?" He asked. I honestly liked Bennett. I expected him to be an asshole because he was Bennett Williams but really, he was just plain nice. He wasn't a dick and he wasn't annoying. He was just perfect. Elisa was lucky. She finally found a decent guy.
"Yep," I said.
Elisa turned around. "Stop," She said laughing a little. She wasn't stressed anymore. I think it was Bennett. He had weird effects on her now. It was so strange. "It's dark brown." She said.
"Really? Well, I can't wait to see it." He said. He was cute too. I was a little jealous of her- I'm not lying.
"Okay," She said. "See you tonight."
"Bye," He said.
She hung up. And I nudged her. "A stupid decision my butt." I said. "You look like Rainie Joseph. I wish I looked like Rainie Joseph." She smiled a little tucking her phone away.
"Bennett's friends with Paul Spinella now," She said. "They work together."
I smiled. "Have you seen Rainie Joseph finally?" I asked.
She smiled. "See her?" She said faking cockiness. "I talk to her all the time."
"Whatever," I said.
* * *
She hung up her phone adn put it into her pocket. She was insecure. Touching her neck and looking ahead like a car was coming to hit us. "You look fine," I said driving her. She was letting me borrow her car tonight because I was bored and the Wagon was in the shop- again.
"I'm so scared." She said.
"Of what?" I asked. She had jsut hung up with Bennett. "He isn't going to break up with you because you dyed your hair."
She nodded. "I know." She said. She was such a mess now. The IHOP was looming blue in the distance. We pulled up and there were two silhouettes in the parking lot. I let them cross in front of me but suddenly I knew who they were. It was a girl and a boy and the girl lit up instantly. She came over to Elisa's side and Elisa rolled down the window.
"When did you dye your hair?" She asked.
I was staring at Rainie Joseph. She knew Elisa. I felt bad for not believing this. Elisa just blushed. "Tonight," She said.
"You look so pretty," Rainie Joseph said smiling. "I love it!"
Rainie Joseph was prettier in person and up close. She looked across at me. "Hi," She said reaching her hand in. "I'm Rainie." I hesitated but shook it.
"Cass," I said.
"Oh," She brightened up. "The famous friend Cass," She smiled at me. "It's nice to meet you."
I stared at Rainie Joseph. "It's nice to meet you too." She knew who I was? I felt like hypervenolating.
"Rain," She whirled around. "I'm going inside it's cold."
I felt like I was meeting celebrities or something. Paul Spinella was there talking to Bennett Williams and yelling to Rainie Joseph. I thought this was so unreal. "Eh-lisa!" A kid shot out of the restaurant. "Come out, I hear you changed your hair."
Elisa looked at me. "Do you want to come in with us?" She asked. She wanted me to. She wanted someone with her. I shook my head seeing Bennett waiting for Elisa to get out of the car. I was seeing Elisa less but tonight she was supposed to hang out with Bennett.
"No," I said. "I promised Miles I'd go over and watch a movie with him."
"Come on," Rainie Joseph said. "I always wanted to meet Miles too."
I stared at her shortly. She knew Miles too. I felt starstruck. A kid came over pushing Rain out of the way. He opened the door. "Elisa you look spectacular." The kid said. "You're already out of Bennett's league, now you're on fucking Pluto."
Rainie laughed, she was so pretty.
Elisa looked at me. "Are you sure?" She asked. "You can invite Miles too."
"No," I said. "Go,"
I wacthed her get out and all of a sudden I saw Bennett come out and look at her. He smiled. I was so happy for her. Rainie waved to me and I pulled out. I drove Miles' house and told him everything.
Elisa was friends with all of these popular kids now. I couldn't even believe it. Rainie Joseph knew both of us. But Miles just nodded. "Yuo could have gone with them." He said. "I would have understood."
I shook my head. I wanted to hang out with Miles. I always did. "I want to be here," I said.
He smiled and we watched the movie.
Rainie Joseph knew who I was. I couldn't get over it.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
What if One-shot
I stood there. This was it. The last goodbye for all of this. The best year of my life was ending. I moved my hands into my pockets and looked around. I had no idea where she was, but I just waited- searching for dark blue. A pair of hands covered my eyes and I smiled peeling them off. I turned around and there she was. She smiled leaning up to kiss me. "You look so depressed," She said softly smiling. I moved my fingers through her hair.
"I'm not," I said. I kissed her forehead and moved my arms down her back. She pressed her face into my chest. I moved my arms tighter around her.
She stepped back and kissed me again. "Tonight was perfect," She said smiling at me. I loved when she smiled at me like this. A year ago I thought this was never possible. And here she was. I kissed her. "I know," I said softly.
She wove her fingers into mine and turned looking around. "Rainie!" Someone called. We looked over and it was Allison. And instantly Rain squeezed my hand beside me.
"Hi," She said faking a smile. I hung back swallowing. Paul was here.
"I didn't see you at all tonight," Allison said. "You look so pretty."
"You too," Rain said to be polite. I ran a hand through my hair awkwardly looking around for him. He had his back to us- having no idea Allison was over here.
"So what's new?" She asked brightly. "What colleges are you both going to?"
Rain looked at me exchanging a look. "Chicago," I said. "We're both going."
"Oh," Allison said smiling. "Good for you. I'm going to Brown in Boston, and Paul's going to Chicago too. I got into Chicago but my parents went to Brown so I had to go there."
Rainie smiled for her. I could tell. Paul was going to Chicago. Fuck. "That's such a good school." Was all she came up with to say. They went back and forth. Asking about this and about that. I just stood there listening and tuning them out slowly.
I looked over and saw Elisa. I looked at Rain. "I'll be right back." I said.
She gave me a look like don't-leave-me but I had to say goodbye to Elisa. I walked over to her- even though we haven't spoken in a month or two. I waved and she nodded looking down. "Hey," I said smiling a little.
"Hi," She said softly.
"So," I said. "How was prom?"
She shrugged a shoulder. "Uneventful," She said quietly. "How about you?"
I shrugged. "Alright," I didn't want to rub in her face that I had a great time. I spent the whole time with Rain and we just talked and danced a little- not much. She was gorgeous and she was perfect. I slipped my hands into my pockets. "Who did you go with?"
She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "Matt Godrick," She said quietly.
I paused. I heard her and Nathan broke up a few weeks ago. "What happened with you and Nathan?" I asked.
She swallowed. "He broke up with me," She said softly. "We were together a year and it was right on our anniversary."
I stared at her. "I'm sorry," I said quietly.
She shrugged. "I don't know why I stayed with him." She said. "I just thought I'd end up alone or something." I remembered our last conversation. It was Sunday Drive and we were sitting at IHOP. Rainie was in the bathroom and Jonah was asleep. Jeremy long gone. It started with normal conversation and ended with I'm sorry I even said anything. I take it back.
I never second-guessed that Rainie loved me. I knew somewhere she did- she'd always love Paul and I can't compete with him, but here was Elisa. A girl who said she thought she had feelings for me and that they were stronger than her feelings for Nathan. That's what it was like so long ago last summer when I did the same thing Elisa did but to Rainie.
"I'm sorry," I said again.
She nodded. I felt bad. "What college are you going to?" She changed the subject.
"Chicago," I said.
She nodded. "My dad teaches there," She said. "He does English classes. It's a nice school."
I nodded. She looked over my shoulder. "Rain's waiting," She informed me. I nodded looking at Elisa. She was pretty. Her hair was black now. She looked tired and she was wearing a black short dress. She was much darker than Rainie and could actually wear black witohut looking pale. She was pretty, and I opened my mouth.
"I want to stay in touch," I said. "You were one of my closest friends and I miss talking to you."
She stared at me. Her eyes were two different colors tonight. I couldn't look in them too long.
"Who knows," I said. "If things were different, maybe we would have ended up together and who knows what will happen eventually, but I don't want to lose touch with you because of something like that."
She nodded. "Who knows," She said quietly. "It could have happened with us."
I nodded. "I have to get going soon, but I'll email you this weekend."
She nodded. "Stay in touch," I got suddenly she was mocking me. We wouldn't stay in touch. It was like Rain and Paul. They always say they're friends but they really aren't. I stepped closer to her and hugged her. She sat there stiff in my arms and I walked away over to Rainie. She kissed me. "Ready to go?" She asked.
I smiled. "Yeah," I said. "If you are."
I meant Paul. She wanted to talk to Paul. I knew she did. She nodded. "Come on," She says. We got into my car and pulled out. She put on a Sunday Drive CD and turned it up. She staretd singing and smiling and laughing. She was beautiful. And when we pulled into her driveway we turned it down and turned all the lights off. I kissed her. "I love you Rain."
She just kissed me. And still, I told myself not to doubt her. She had to love me at least a little bit.
"I'm not," I said. I kissed her forehead and moved my arms down her back. She pressed her face into my chest. I moved my arms tighter around her.
She stepped back and kissed me again. "Tonight was perfect," She said smiling at me. I loved when she smiled at me like this. A year ago I thought this was never possible. And here she was. I kissed her. "I know," I said softly.
She wove her fingers into mine and turned looking around. "Rainie!" Someone called. We looked over and it was Allison. And instantly Rain squeezed my hand beside me.
"Hi," She said faking a smile. I hung back swallowing. Paul was here.
"I didn't see you at all tonight," Allison said. "You look so pretty."
"You too," Rain said to be polite. I ran a hand through my hair awkwardly looking around for him. He had his back to us- having no idea Allison was over here.
"So what's new?" She asked brightly. "What colleges are you both going to?"
Rain looked at me exchanging a look. "Chicago," I said. "We're both going."
"Oh," Allison said smiling. "Good for you. I'm going to Brown in Boston, and Paul's going to Chicago too. I got into Chicago but my parents went to Brown so I had to go there."
Rainie smiled for her. I could tell. Paul was going to Chicago. Fuck. "That's such a good school." Was all she came up with to say. They went back and forth. Asking about this and about that. I just stood there listening and tuning them out slowly.
I looked over and saw Elisa. I looked at Rain. "I'll be right back." I said.
She gave me a look like don't-leave-me but I had to say goodbye to Elisa. I walked over to her- even though we haven't spoken in a month or two. I waved and she nodded looking down. "Hey," I said smiling a little.
"Hi," She said softly.
"So," I said. "How was prom?"
She shrugged a shoulder. "Uneventful," She said quietly. "How about you?"
I shrugged. "Alright," I didn't want to rub in her face that I had a great time. I spent the whole time with Rain and we just talked and danced a little- not much. She was gorgeous and she was perfect. I slipped my hands into my pockets. "Who did you go with?"
She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "Matt Godrick," She said quietly.
I paused. I heard her and Nathan broke up a few weeks ago. "What happened with you and Nathan?" I asked.
She swallowed. "He broke up with me," She said softly. "We were together a year and it was right on our anniversary."
I stared at her. "I'm sorry," I said quietly.
She shrugged. "I don't know why I stayed with him." She said. "I just thought I'd end up alone or something." I remembered our last conversation. It was Sunday Drive and we were sitting at IHOP. Rainie was in the bathroom and Jonah was asleep. Jeremy long gone. It started with normal conversation and ended with I'm sorry I even said anything. I take it back.
I never second-guessed that Rainie loved me. I knew somewhere she did- she'd always love Paul and I can't compete with him, but here was Elisa. A girl who said she thought she had feelings for me and that they were stronger than her feelings for Nathan. That's what it was like so long ago last summer when I did the same thing Elisa did but to Rainie.
"I'm sorry," I said again.
She nodded. I felt bad. "What college are you going to?" She changed the subject.
"Chicago," I said.
She nodded. "My dad teaches there," She said. "He does English classes. It's a nice school."
I nodded. She looked over my shoulder. "Rain's waiting," She informed me. I nodded looking at Elisa. She was pretty. Her hair was black now. She looked tired and she was wearing a black short dress. She was much darker than Rainie and could actually wear black witohut looking pale. She was pretty, and I opened my mouth.
"I want to stay in touch," I said. "You were one of my closest friends and I miss talking to you."
She stared at me. Her eyes were two different colors tonight. I couldn't look in them too long.
"Who knows," I said. "If things were different, maybe we would have ended up together and who knows what will happen eventually, but I don't want to lose touch with you because of something like that."
She nodded. "Who knows," She said quietly. "It could have happened with us."
I nodded. "I have to get going soon, but I'll email you this weekend."
She nodded. "Stay in touch," I got suddenly she was mocking me. We wouldn't stay in touch. It was like Rain and Paul. They always say they're friends but they really aren't. I stepped closer to her and hugged her. She sat there stiff in my arms and I walked away over to Rainie. She kissed me. "Ready to go?" She asked.
I smiled. "Yeah," I said. "If you are."
I meant Paul. She wanted to talk to Paul. I knew she did. She nodded. "Come on," She says. We got into my car and pulled out. She put on a Sunday Drive CD and turned it up. She staretd singing and smiling and laughing. She was beautiful. And when we pulled into her driveway we turned it down and turned all the lights off. I kissed her. "I love you Rain."
She just kissed me. And still, I told myself not to doubt her. She had to love me at least a little bit.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
sean's pov ---- jonah's house/bennett's house
Jonah was getting drunk. I could tell. There wasn't much of a difference from normal Jonah and drunk Jonah except when he's drunk he talks less. When he's high he just sits on the ground and stares at fixed points. I was walking by when I heard it. "Eh-lisa Lor-en!"
Bennett was playing downstairs so I didn't feel a need to play the role of protecting him. I walked towards the door and she was standing there alone "Hi," She said quietly.
"What is new?" He asked leaning against the door.
I walk closer and see that her face is flushed and she has been crying. "Nothing," She says. "Um, is Bennett here?" She points in towards the party.
I walk up. "I wouldn't talk to him if I were you," I said. She looks at me and suddenly she shrinks back. "He's not doing too good. He's down there playing depressing Dashboard and Alkaline... if you're here to talk to him about whatever, I'm sorry."
She looks down. "Oh," She says quietly.
Then Jonah puts a hand on my chest. He looks at her. "I'll let you in," He says. "Depending on what your intentions are."
She looks at him, and she blushes instantly. "I just," She loses what she's saying. "I just broke up with Nathan."
Jonah pushes me back and steps out of the way. He ushers her in and she steps in awkwardly looking around. "Come on," He says. He starts down the stairs after shutting the door. Bennett is packing up and people are avoiding him. He's pretty pissed off and emo right now. He shuts his case and sips the water bottle in his hand. I don't know if it's liquor or water or both but he stands up and Jonah waves at him.
He makes eye contact with me and then his eyes move in Elisa's direction and he just nods at Jonah and me and walks away. I look at Elisa who is just watching him. "Sorry," Jonah says. "He's not that happy of a camper."
She looks down and tucks hair behind her ear. "Okay," She says. "Um, thanks though, for letting me in."
"No problem," Jonah says. I watch her but the door opposite the room opens and closes with Bennett slipping out with Jonah's guitar to keep it in the sound room. Elisa starts up the stairs and I watch her.
It's stupid and it'll just make more of a mess but I call after her. "Hey," She turns. "He's leaving now and walking home probably. You can probably catch him if you want to."
She pauses. "Thanks," She says quietly to me. And I turn around. Jonah sighs throwing an arm around my shoulder. "The things we do for Bennett fucking Williams." He sighs.
I roll my eyes. "I don't know why I bother," I said moving my arm around Jonah as a joke. "He's cool and shit but God, his love life's wearing me down."
"What even happened with her?" Jonah asks. "They had sex didn't they?"
"If only," I roll my eyes. "He's still a virgin- just found out him and Rainie never did anything. I have no idea why he's so pissed off." I pull my arm away.
"She is pretty," Jonah says. "And a Sunday Drive hardcore- that lead singer of Sunday Drive was eating her up at the show. She's more obsessed than Bennett."
I raise my eyebrows. "Ten bucks he ignores her," I say.
"Ten bucks she takes his virginity," Jonah says smirking.
"He wishes," I go up to get a beer. Jeremy's walking in with a backpack. He points behind him.
"Bennett and the girl are out there," He said. "Well, she's trying to keep up with him."
I turn around to Jonah. "Give me those ten bucks," I said. "He speed walks like a motherfucker." Jonah sighs and reaches into his back pocket and gets out a wad of cash he got from the keg an hour ago. He hands me a soggy ten and I pocket it. I feel bad for Elisa, but theirs no second-chances in Bennett's books.
By the end of the night I don't get any pissed off Bennett phone calls. I don't hear from him again. That means he's sulking. I don't really give a shit. I'll deal with it tomorrow. I smoke a few bowls with Jeremy only to wake up the next morning in Jonah's basement not even remembering anything about last night other than I should have a voicemail from Bennett.
Jonah jumps on top of me. "I'm going to visit Bennett," He says. "Wanna' come?"
I sigh getting up. "No," I say. My head doesn't hurt and Jonah never gets hung over. Jeremy's passed out next to me.
"Come on," He says. "I stole your wallet while you were sleeping." I reach back and pat my pockets. He did. Not surprising...
"Then you'll buy us IHOP as we try and emotionally re-stabilize him. I say we buy him a prositute too or a stripper or something. He needs to get some fucking balls sooner or later." He pulls me up to my feet. "You can just talk Ellen up while I pick up our shattered little boy and get him some deep fried mother fucking pancakes."
I run a hand through my hair. "Come on," I say. We walk over to his house and it's a short walk. I'm pretty sure I won the bet no matter what. His car is parked in the driveway with Ellen's and it's freezing. We go into the house.
"Hello?" Ellen calls fromthe kitchen.
"Ellen!" Jonah calls. "Where's my second favorite tenant in the Williams household?"
I see her come out drying a dish off. "He's still asleep," She says smiling. Ellen looks about twenty but she's really thirty seven or eight. She lowers her voice. "What's wrong with him?"
Sometimes I forget this is his mother. I forget she gave birth to him like seventeen years ago. I walk into the kitchen and lean against the counter as Jonah takes the stairs. "Elisa Loren," I say.
There is a moment when she pouts a little. I wish my mom was like this. "That's a shame, she was my favorite." She said.
I nod and then I hear Jonah's voice from Bennett's room. I sigh and Ellen and I both start for the stairs. We make it and head up. "You have to get up," She says to Bennett.
He groans and whines about going to bed at four. He's not hung over. He's just pissy. I blast music and he just groans getting up to shut it off. Jonah is insinuating he goes after Elisa but I can tell. I sigh and take out the ten bucks from my pocket when Bennett isn't looking. I give ti to Jonah. "I'll give you free coffee," I said. "Give me my wallett back."
Jonah hands it to me and I shove it down my back pocket.
"So," Jonah starts. "You and Elisa... you guys heading for Rainie and Paul's status?"
Bennett ignores us and goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth. "We're going ot IHOP." Jonah announces.
"You are," He said. "I'm going to Carol's."
"Why?" I ask.
"I'm going with Elisa," He says.
"Wow..." Jonah starts. "You ditch me already fro some chick who likes a band you like... wow. What ever happened to bros before Elisa?"
Bennett just rolls his eyes and goes downstairs and gets some coffee. I follow him. This is better than picking up his mess.
*****
wrtoe a wek ago in twenty minutes. pretty fast-paced and lacking there of detail. hah. sorry.
Bennett was playing downstairs so I didn't feel a need to play the role of protecting him. I walked towards the door and she was standing there alone "Hi," She said quietly.
"What is new?" He asked leaning against the door.
I walk closer and see that her face is flushed and she has been crying. "Nothing," She says. "Um, is Bennett here?" She points in towards the party.
I walk up. "I wouldn't talk to him if I were you," I said. She looks at me and suddenly she shrinks back. "He's not doing too good. He's down there playing depressing Dashboard and Alkaline... if you're here to talk to him about whatever, I'm sorry."
She looks down. "Oh," She says quietly.
Then Jonah puts a hand on my chest. He looks at her. "I'll let you in," He says. "Depending on what your intentions are."
She looks at him, and she blushes instantly. "I just," She loses what she's saying. "I just broke up with Nathan."
Jonah pushes me back and steps out of the way. He ushers her in and she steps in awkwardly looking around. "Come on," He says. He starts down the stairs after shutting the door. Bennett is packing up and people are avoiding him. He's pretty pissed off and emo right now. He shuts his case and sips the water bottle in his hand. I don't know if it's liquor or water or both but he stands up and Jonah waves at him.
He makes eye contact with me and then his eyes move in Elisa's direction and he just nods at Jonah and me and walks away. I look at Elisa who is just watching him. "Sorry," Jonah says. "He's not that happy of a camper."
She looks down and tucks hair behind her ear. "Okay," She says. "Um, thanks though, for letting me in."
"No problem," Jonah says. I watch her but the door opposite the room opens and closes with Bennett slipping out with Jonah's guitar to keep it in the sound room. Elisa starts up the stairs and I watch her.
It's stupid and it'll just make more of a mess but I call after her. "Hey," She turns. "He's leaving now and walking home probably. You can probably catch him if you want to."
She pauses. "Thanks," She says quietly to me. And I turn around. Jonah sighs throwing an arm around my shoulder. "The things we do for Bennett fucking Williams." He sighs.
I roll my eyes. "I don't know why I bother," I said moving my arm around Jonah as a joke. "He's cool and shit but God, his love life's wearing me down."
"What even happened with her?" Jonah asks. "They had sex didn't they?"
"If only," I roll my eyes. "He's still a virgin- just found out him and Rainie never did anything. I have no idea why he's so pissed off." I pull my arm away.
"She is pretty," Jonah says. "And a Sunday Drive hardcore- that lead singer of Sunday Drive was eating her up at the show. She's more obsessed than Bennett."
I raise my eyebrows. "Ten bucks he ignores her," I say.
"Ten bucks she takes his virginity," Jonah says smirking.
"He wishes," I go up to get a beer. Jeremy's walking in with a backpack. He points behind him.
"Bennett and the girl are out there," He said. "Well, she's trying to keep up with him."
I turn around to Jonah. "Give me those ten bucks," I said. "He speed walks like a motherfucker." Jonah sighs and reaches into his back pocket and gets out a wad of cash he got from the keg an hour ago. He hands me a soggy ten and I pocket it. I feel bad for Elisa, but theirs no second-chances in Bennett's books.
By the end of the night I don't get any pissed off Bennett phone calls. I don't hear from him again. That means he's sulking. I don't really give a shit. I'll deal with it tomorrow. I smoke a few bowls with Jeremy only to wake up the next morning in Jonah's basement not even remembering anything about last night other than I should have a voicemail from Bennett.
Jonah jumps on top of me. "I'm going to visit Bennett," He says. "Wanna' come?"
I sigh getting up. "No," I say. My head doesn't hurt and Jonah never gets hung over. Jeremy's passed out next to me.
"Come on," He says. "I stole your wallet while you were sleeping." I reach back and pat my pockets. He did. Not surprising...
"Then you'll buy us IHOP as we try and emotionally re-stabilize him. I say we buy him a prositute too or a stripper or something. He needs to get some fucking balls sooner or later." He pulls me up to my feet. "You can just talk Ellen up while I pick up our shattered little boy and get him some deep fried mother fucking pancakes."
I run a hand through my hair. "Come on," I say. We walk over to his house and it's a short walk. I'm pretty sure I won the bet no matter what. His car is parked in the driveway with Ellen's and it's freezing. We go into the house.
"Hello?" Ellen calls fromthe kitchen.
"Ellen!" Jonah calls. "Where's my second favorite tenant in the Williams household?"
I see her come out drying a dish off. "He's still asleep," She says smiling. Ellen looks about twenty but she's really thirty seven or eight. She lowers her voice. "What's wrong with him?"
Sometimes I forget this is his mother. I forget she gave birth to him like seventeen years ago. I walk into the kitchen and lean against the counter as Jonah takes the stairs. "Elisa Loren," I say.
There is a moment when she pouts a little. I wish my mom was like this. "That's a shame, she was my favorite." She said.
I nod and then I hear Jonah's voice from Bennett's room. I sigh and Ellen and I both start for the stairs. We make it and head up. "You have to get up," She says to Bennett.
He groans and whines about going to bed at four. He's not hung over. He's just pissy. I blast music and he just groans getting up to shut it off. Jonah is insinuating he goes after Elisa but I can tell. I sigh and take out the ten bucks from my pocket when Bennett isn't looking. I give ti to Jonah. "I'll give you free coffee," I said. "Give me my wallett back."
Jonah hands it to me and I shove it down my back pocket.
"So," Jonah starts. "You and Elisa... you guys heading for Rainie and Paul's status?"
Bennett ignores us and goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth. "We're going ot IHOP." Jonah announces.
"You are," He said. "I'm going to Carol's."
"Why?" I ask.
"I'm going with Elisa," He says.
"Wow..." Jonah starts. "You ditch me already fro some chick who likes a band you like... wow. What ever happened to bros before Elisa?"
Bennett just rolls his eyes and goes downstairs and gets some coffee. I follow him. This is better than picking up his mess.
*****
wrtoe a wek ago in twenty minutes. pretty fast-paced and lacking there of detail. hah. sorry.
sean's pov ---- kerrington high parking lot
We opened the doors of his car and got in. I sat there buckling myself in. Bennett stared at the steering wheel. "Do you have a cigarette?" He asked.
This was bad. I reached into my back pocket and pulled one out. Bennett tried smoking but his mom got mad at him so he stopped. He just went back to dreaming about Rainie Joseph and wasting all of his money going to shows. Now he smokes when he's stressed. I produced a cigarette and handed it to him. I got out my lighter and passed it to him too and he lite it taking in a deep drag.
I get myself one too. And we sit there smoking in his car. "Where were you yesterday?" He coughs and I wait. It'll come out soon. He stares at the steering wheel and inhales again. "I smoked a few bowls with Jeremy yesterday." He says.
He smokes pot when he's depressed or just trying to get fucked up. I nod. "Elisa give you the speech?" I ask. I figure it was that. Elisa would never cheat on her boyfriend. The girls he don't just give the speech. "I like you as a friend and sort of like you-like you but I'm in love with my boyfriend- you're just making this hard for me. I think we should stop talking for a little while."
"Nope," He says.
"Then what?" I ask looking at him. Maybe Elisa is really different when you get to know her.
He takes another drag blowing out smoke concentrating on the steering wheel. "I stayed over her house."
"You fucked her?" I ask. Scratch that: Elisa is a slut.
He shakes his head. "No," He says. "We just hooked up but I fell asleep, but she's staying with Nathan. She fucked me."
I look forward and smoke some more. He finished his cigarette and throws it out the window. He starts his car and pulls out of his parking space. He makes it to the cross-walk in front of the school where he stops. Nathan Pratt is making his way across it with some friends- his arm thrown around a girl who isn't Elisa by about half a foot and three bra sizes. He waves grinning at Bennett.
This is worse. His knuckles go white and he hits the gas and then the brakes in three seconds. He doesn't hit Nathan just scares him. Bennett lays on his horn and Nathan just stares and hurries across with his band of stupid frat-football players. I look at Bennett. He's pissed and he keeps driving not looking at me.
I feel like I'm driving with a maniac but once we hit a red light his knuckles turn red as he loosens his grip. He's just depressed again. Not pissed off or off in left field, he's just depressed. I lean forward and put on New Found Glory and instead of looking at me. He just keeps driving concentrating on the road.
So I don't bother with the guitar solo. I'm not even in the mood.
This was bad. I reached into my back pocket and pulled one out. Bennett tried smoking but his mom got mad at him so he stopped. He just went back to dreaming about Rainie Joseph and wasting all of his money going to shows. Now he smokes when he's stressed. I produced a cigarette and handed it to him. I got out my lighter and passed it to him too and he lite it taking in a deep drag.
I get myself one too. And we sit there smoking in his car. "Where were you yesterday?" He coughs and I wait. It'll come out soon. He stares at the steering wheel and inhales again. "I smoked a few bowls with Jeremy yesterday." He says.
He smokes pot when he's depressed or just trying to get fucked up. I nod. "Elisa give you the speech?" I ask. I figure it was that. Elisa would never cheat on her boyfriend. The girls he don't just give the speech. "I like you as a friend and sort of like you-like you but I'm in love with my boyfriend- you're just making this hard for me. I think we should stop talking for a little while."
"Nope," He says.
"Then what?" I ask looking at him. Maybe Elisa is really different when you get to know her.
He takes another drag blowing out smoke concentrating on the steering wheel. "I stayed over her house."
"You fucked her?" I ask. Scratch that: Elisa is a slut.
He shakes his head. "No," He says. "We just hooked up but I fell asleep, but she's staying with Nathan. She fucked me."
I look forward and smoke some more. He finished his cigarette and throws it out the window. He starts his car and pulls out of his parking space. He makes it to the cross-walk in front of the school where he stops. Nathan Pratt is making his way across it with some friends- his arm thrown around a girl who isn't Elisa by about half a foot and three bra sizes. He waves grinning at Bennett.
This is worse. His knuckles go white and he hits the gas and then the brakes in three seconds. He doesn't hit Nathan just scares him. Bennett lays on his horn and Nathan just stares and hurries across with his band of stupid frat-football players. I look at Bennett. He's pissed and he keeps driving not looking at me.
I feel like I'm driving with a maniac but once we hit a red light his knuckles turn red as he loosens his grip. He's just depressed again. Not pissed off or off in left field, he's just depressed. I lean forward and put on New Found Glory and instead of looking at me. He just keeps driving concentrating on the road.
So I don't bother with the guitar solo. I'm not even in the mood.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
rainie's pov --- setting: coolen high cafeteria
I come up sitting down next to Paul whose already sitting at our usual table. Jess-ee-cah sits across from me. "Guess what I got?" I ask him leaning again him.
"Strawberry fruit snacks," He says not even looking at me. I shake his cast under the table.
"You're too smart for me, Paul Spinella," I say pressing a kiss to his cheek.
Jess rolls her eyes. "You do this everyday," She said. "God, it's intoxicating sitting near you guys." She always makes that comment too. I take them out and rip the bag open and start picking out pieces and popping them into my mouth.
"Guess what?" I ask.
"What?" Jess asks.
"I guess I hooked up with Bennett Williams last week," I say. "I mean, the details are a little fuzzy but I've heard the possibility of oral and other nasty deeds were involved."
Paul doesn't even wince. "That's funny," He says. "Where?"
"Jonah O'Connor's house," I say popping another strawberry fruit snack into my mouth. "Which is funnier because we were together the whole time. Must be amnesia..."
Jess shakes her head. "Heard Bennett has a new girl." She says sipping her soda pop. I look at her. "Who?" I ask.
"Elisa Loren," Paul says next to me.
I look at him. He takes a bite of his school buffalo chicken sandwich. And I wait. "Whose that?" Jess asks looking at him. "Some new girl? A slut without a reputation yet?"
He chews and swallows. "You know that shitty band Three Cheers?" He asks me.
I hug his arm. "The band we met over?" I ask smiling batting my eyes.
He sighs. "Yeah, that one," He says. "The singer Nathan Pratt's girlfriend."
"How do you know?" Jess-ee-cah asks. "I thought you and Williams weren't on speaking terms."
Paul looks up. "No," He says. "We talk all the time. We work together a lot and she came in once and he freaked out about it. Sean Mayor said he's liked her for almost a month now."
"Have you seen her?" I ask him loosening my grip of his arm.
He nods. "She's short," He says. "And-"
"Is she pretty?" Jess-ee-cah cuts in.
"Don't say 'yes' I say," I say pulling away from him. He rolls his eyes and eats more of his sandwich. I look at his lunch grimancing. His lips taste gross after he eats this sandwich. I pop a strawberry fruit snack into my mouth.
"I'm hunting her down," Jess-ee-cah says matter-of-factly. "I bet she's pretty. I'm surprised I don't know her..."
"She's a junior," Paul says. "She's really quiet too."
"She's not a slut?" Jess asks.
I shoot her a look. "You're not funny." I say. "These Rainie-is-a-slut jokes are getting old."
She smiles and looks down. Paul shifts and then Jess looks up and sees this girl walking by. "Hey, Mand," She jumps up. "Do you know a girl names Elisa Lauren at Kerrington?"
I pop another strawberry fruit snack into my mouth and Paul keeps eating his gross sandwich. I look at him. "Is she pretty?" I ask.
He looks at me shrugging. That's an obvious yes. I nudge him. "Oh, well," I say. "At least I know if you break up with me for some girl you're going to drive into a tree once you realize you've blown it."
He sighs and looks away. I lean my head on his shoulder. He puts his andwich down. "I love you," I say.
"I love you, too," He says. I smile and look at him. He kisses my lips quickly and gets up to throw his tray away. I stand up with him weaving my fingers into his. "What are you doing?" He asks.
"You're going to buy some fruit snacks to share with me," I say. "Right?"
He throws his tray away and we walk over to where they sell fruit snacks. He gets the strawberry kind and hands them to me. I'm still not done with my other bag but we go back and sit across from each other and eat them. I love strawberry fruit snacks, and his lips taste like strawberries like when they do when he eats strawberry pancakes at IHOP.
"Strawberry fruit snacks," He says not even looking at me. I shake his cast under the table.
"You're too smart for me, Paul Spinella," I say pressing a kiss to his cheek.
Jess rolls her eyes. "You do this everyday," She said. "God, it's intoxicating sitting near you guys." She always makes that comment too. I take them out and rip the bag open and start picking out pieces and popping them into my mouth.
"Guess what?" I ask.
"What?" Jess asks.
"I guess I hooked up with Bennett Williams last week," I say. "I mean, the details are a little fuzzy but I've heard the possibility of oral and other nasty deeds were involved."
Paul doesn't even wince. "That's funny," He says. "Where?"
"Jonah O'Connor's house," I say popping another strawberry fruit snack into my mouth. "Which is funnier because we were together the whole time. Must be amnesia..."
Jess shakes her head. "Heard Bennett has a new girl." She says sipping her soda pop. I look at her. "Who?" I ask.
"Elisa Loren," Paul says next to me.
I look at him. He takes a bite of his school buffalo chicken sandwich. And I wait. "Whose that?" Jess asks looking at him. "Some new girl? A slut without a reputation yet?"
He chews and swallows. "You know that shitty band Three Cheers?" He asks me.
I hug his arm. "The band we met over?" I ask smiling batting my eyes.
He sighs. "Yeah, that one," He says. "The singer Nathan Pratt's girlfriend."
"How do you know?" Jess-ee-cah asks. "I thought you and Williams weren't on speaking terms."
Paul looks up. "No," He says. "We talk all the time. We work together a lot and she came in once and he freaked out about it. Sean Mayor said he's liked her for almost a month now."
"Have you seen her?" I ask him loosening my grip of his arm.
He nods. "She's short," He says. "And-"
"Is she pretty?" Jess-ee-cah cuts in.
"Don't say 'yes' I say," I say pulling away from him. He rolls his eyes and eats more of his sandwich. I look at his lunch grimancing. His lips taste gross after he eats this sandwich. I pop a strawberry fruit snack into my mouth.
"I'm hunting her down," Jess-ee-cah says matter-of-factly. "I bet she's pretty. I'm surprised I don't know her..."
"She's a junior," Paul says. "She's really quiet too."
"She's not a slut?" Jess asks.
I shoot her a look. "You're not funny." I say. "These Rainie-is-a-slut jokes are getting old."
She smiles and looks down. Paul shifts and then Jess looks up and sees this girl walking by. "Hey, Mand," She jumps up. "Do you know a girl names Elisa Lauren at Kerrington?"
I pop another strawberry fruit snack into my mouth and Paul keeps eating his gross sandwich. I look at him. "Is she pretty?" I ask.
He looks at me shrugging. That's an obvious yes. I nudge him. "Oh, well," I say. "At least I know if you break up with me for some girl you're going to drive into a tree once you realize you've blown it."
He sighs and looks away. I lean my head on his shoulder. He puts his andwich down. "I love you," I say.
"I love you, too," He says. I smile and look at him. He kisses my lips quickly and gets up to throw his tray away. I stand up with him weaving my fingers into his. "What are you doing?" He asks.
"You're going to buy some fruit snacks to share with me," I say. "Right?"
He throws his tray away and we walk over to where they sell fruit snacks. He gets the strawberry kind and hands them to me. I'm still not done with my other bag but we go back and sit across from each other and eat them. I love strawberry fruit snacks, and his lips taste like strawberries like when they do when he eats strawberry pancakes at IHOP.
cass's pov --- setting: kerrington high cafeteria
"No," Miles said dryly. "I'm not going to talk to Kevin for you."
"Why?" I asked. There was no reason not to. Miles was my best friend. I'd do the same thing for him. If he ever even liked someone. I sighed when he just took a bite out of his green salad wrap and busied himself eating it. Elisa sat silently beside me picking at her sandwich and staring down at it. The silence overtook us. I leaned onto my arm and looked at my half of Elisa's sandwich. I hated lunches like this.
Then I saw Kevin. He smiled at me and my heart started speeding. I waved to him and smiled back. He started coming over but was cut off by Bennett Williams who was walking back to his table. I remembered the only time I ever sort-of talked to Bennett Williams- he was so goodlooking. Rainie Joseph was lucky to have even had a small chance with him. I heard he dumped her.
Kevin kept coming over and sat down across from me when Miles scooted over across from Elisa quickly. "Hey," He said.
"Hi," I said brightly. I never wanted a boyfriend so badly. Miles rolled his eyes the way he does and ignores us the best he can. "What's up?"
"Nothing," He said. "I always thought I had a shitty lunch until now. Do you mind me sitting here?"
"It's completely fine," I said smiling leaning closer to him.
Miles got up in the mad way he does. "I need a knife," He mumbles and walks away. I look at him and then Kevin leans towards me. "What's up with that kid? He's always so pissed off..."
I shake my head. "Miles is so cool," I said. "We're really good friends." I always make it a point that people know how good friends me and Miles are. Everyone really likes him or they just don't get him. He's hard to graps but he's on of the nicest people you will ever meet. I look over and see him walking stiffly away over to the plastic knives and what not. He just is insecure around Kevin, I think.
Elisa stiffens all of a sudden, she's looking up ahead of her and all of a sudden I see Bennett Williams. He's not just walking by mindlessly like he always does- he's like a fucking movie star. Everyone around him is just white noise. He's smiling. Not at one of his friends or someone he knows. "Hey, Elisa," He says waving.
I look at her as Kevin looks behind himself. She touches her neck and smiles a little. "Hi," She says but instantly dives into a rosey shade of pink. He comes over to her.
"Did you get your tickets for Sunday Drive?"
My mind is exploding at amazing rates. Reason number one, Bennett Williams knows and is talking to Elisa. Two, she's answering him which means she knows him- because I've never seen anyone except for her stress the rule "don't talk to strangers." Three, he is talking to her about... drumroll, Sudnay Drive. This is a mirage or something.
She shifts looking over at me, and I'm still staring at her. She's a foot or two away from me. "No," She says- her voice tightening. "They sold out by the time I went to order them."
What show are they even talking about? He raises his eyebrows. "Are you serious?" He asks.
She nods, shrugging one shoulder. "I guess I'll just have to see them next time." She says softly.
He points behind him. "You know how I told you Jonah was ordering me a ticket?" He asked. She nods. What? They talk somewhat normally? Elisa Loren is probably the shiest and half-mute person you'll ever get a first impression of. She's talking to Bennett Williams and not even breaking much of a sweat because of him- more because of me. "Well, he got me one and then my other friend ordered me one too, so I was just going to bring someone, but if you want to go with us I could give it to you... I haven't promised it to anyone yet. I was nervous you didn't get one."
Then all of a sudden she brightens up. "Are you sure?" She asks. "I mean, it's okay with your friends if I go?"
"Jonah's obsessed with you," Bennett Williams says... my mind re-explodes. She knows his friends? What. The. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. She is basically planning a date with the hottest emo kid in the entire district and she's more newvous about me staring at her. I. am. fucking. oh. my god. "I don't think it's going to be a problem. Besides I was going to ask Sean who would have gladly shoved the ticket away anyways."
She smiles a little. "Okay," She says. "Yeah, that sounds great."
He smiles. "Cool," He says. "And I've been listening to the EP over and over again. It's incredible."
She smiles at him still. I look at Kevin who's waiting for me to notice him. I flash a finger quickly up for a minute to listen some more. "I'm in love with it," She says. Then she looks at me. I make eye contact with her. Then I look and see Bennett look at me.
"This is Cass," Elisa says quickly blushing again. "Cass this is Bennett."
Bennett Williams smiles at me. "I think I've met you before, you're friends with Miles right?"
"Yeah," I say in a high-pitched voice. He remembers me? I was practically fainting in his presence. How is Elisan not dead?
"Elisa's told me a lot about you," He says smiling. "It's nice to meet you again."
I smile and nod. "She hasn't said much about you," I say looking over at her quickly. "Nice meeting you again, too."
A kid jumps up next to him. "Hey there," The kid has glasses on and is tall and in a Saves the Day shirt. "How's my friend Eh-lisa?"
"Hi," She says quietly blushing again.
Bennett Williams sighs and peels the other kid off of his shoulder. "Sorry," He says. "I'll leave you guys alone. But yeah, we can talk later about the details..."
"About what?" The kid presses. Then he gets excited. Not normal excited. A loud hyper kidn of excited. He slams his hands down on the table. "No! You're coming to Sunday Drive with us?" He holds his hand out for a high-five that Elisa blushes again- because of me, I know- and gives him his high-five. "I told him to ask if you had a ticket, sick, now this is a good crowd."
Elisa smiles a little. "Yeah," She says says. She looks at Bennett. "Yeah, I'll see you later. Um, do you want me to send you what I have done on the project?" What project? The only class we have that would have Bennett Williams involved.... the Shakespeare project. I look at Bennett Williams who is smiling at her.
"Yeah," He says. "Send it tonight, and I'll send you the final copy for you to print out tomorrow."
"Okay," She says.
"You coming to see Bennett play at my house this weekend?" The other kid asks sitting down across from Elisa. Miles seems to have vanished but I look at the kid taking his place across from her. She shakes her head. "I can't." She says. "There's..."
"Come on," Bennett Williams tugs on the kids arm. The kid gets up. And keeps looking at Elisa.
"Shh," He says to Bennett Williams. He looks at Elisa. "I want you at my house," He says pointing at Elisa. "Fuck your boyfriend, Sean and Spinella says his band is complete shit anyways. You've missed him two weeks in a row." The kid points to himself. "Do me a solid, Elisa, come to my party get crazy drunk and make out with me."
Elisa shakes her head- strangely she doesn't blush. "I can't," She says. "I'll try and make it though."
Bennett Williams shakes his head. "If you have to see Nathan, go see his band. It's fine."
The kid points at Bennett Williams. "He'll just shit his pants if you come," He says. "He gets nervous easily. Just promise me you'll stop by for five minutes to hear him cover a Sunday Drive song and then you can leave."
Bennett Williams shakes his head and wraps his hand around the kids arm and pulls him away. "I'm sorry," Bennett Williams says sympathetically to Elisa. "He didn't take his meds today. But, hey, I'll talk to you later."
She smiles. "It's okay," She says. "Um, yeah, talk to you later." At that Bennett Williams drags his hyper friend away and Elisa bunches up her sandwich and bag into a ball and gets up quickly and rushes away from me. I look at Kevin.
"Excuse me," I say.
I follow her to the trash and then into the bathroom. She barely makes it to the stall. I grab her arm. "What was that?" I ask smiling.
She turns around defeated. "Please," She says quietly. "Don't make this a big deal. We just talk in English."
"And out of English," I point out. "You know his friends?"
She crosses her arms. "Please, Cass," She looks at me. What's wrong with me asking about her random weird friendship with The Bennett fucking Williams. "It's not a huge deal. One of his friends introduced themselves to me at Death Cab and then I hung out with him on Halloween-"
I stare at her. "I thought you ditched me to hang out with Nathan?" I said. She winces at the word 'ditched' but I can't say she didn't.
She touched her neck. "He ditched me," She said quietly. "And then Jonah and San were trick-or-treating and they invited me over... so I went."
I stare at her. "How long have you been friends with him?" I ask.
She thinks. "A month and a half," She says quietly. "But please, I don't want to get a hard time about this. And I don't want Nathan to find out."
I stare at her. "Why?" I ask.
She turns suddenly as Rachel Powers comes out of the stall. Her mouth is a tight thin line. It splits into a grin when she sees us. "Oh, hi, Elisa." She says. She goes to wash her hands. Elisa goes silent and looks down.
I don't know where to start asking questions. Elisa- who is in love with Nathan- doesn't want him to know about how she's friends with Bennett Williams. Elisa- perfect, pretty, smart, quiet Elisa- is hiding something from the love of her high school career. Then I start to think she's hiding something else.
"What," She says. "Do you like him or something?"
She gives me a look. "No," She says quickly.
Rachel walks out of the bathroom and heads into the cafeteria. Then Elisa turns to the sink and washes her hands for a minute. I stare at her. I feel like I barely know her. She is gone. She's so different. I hadn't even noticed. I look at her and she dries her hands on the thin paper towels balling them up and throwing them in the trash.
"I don't like him," She repeats to me. I look at her. I can tell. She does. I just know.
"Does he like you?" I ask.
She shakes her head silently. Then I start asking questions. They follow her to the lunch table and she tries to tell me as little as possible. Miles and Kevin are talking. There is an exchanging of looks between Elisa and Miles. "You knew?" I ask Miles.
"Yeah," He says hesitating looking at Elisa.
Kevin looks at Elisa suddenly. It's a weird look. It's the looks I see people give Bennett Williams. I start to get why she doesn't want people to know. I find myself looking at her in a new light all on my own. She's not the person I used to know.
The bell rings and she gets up. This is an Elisa Loren I don't know at all. But she's my best friend no matter what.
"Why?" I asked. There was no reason not to. Miles was my best friend. I'd do the same thing for him. If he ever even liked someone. I sighed when he just took a bite out of his green salad wrap and busied himself eating it. Elisa sat silently beside me picking at her sandwich and staring down at it. The silence overtook us. I leaned onto my arm and looked at my half of Elisa's sandwich. I hated lunches like this.
Then I saw Kevin. He smiled at me and my heart started speeding. I waved to him and smiled back. He started coming over but was cut off by Bennett Williams who was walking back to his table. I remembered the only time I ever sort-of talked to Bennett Williams- he was so goodlooking. Rainie Joseph was lucky to have even had a small chance with him. I heard he dumped her.
Kevin kept coming over and sat down across from me when Miles scooted over across from Elisa quickly. "Hey," He said.
"Hi," I said brightly. I never wanted a boyfriend so badly. Miles rolled his eyes the way he does and ignores us the best he can. "What's up?"
"Nothing," He said. "I always thought I had a shitty lunch until now. Do you mind me sitting here?"
"It's completely fine," I said smiling leaning closer to him.
Miles got up in the mad way he does. "I need a knife," He mumbles and walks away. I look at him and then Kevin leans towards me. "What's up with that kid? He's always so pissed off..."
I shake my head. "Miles is so cool," I said. "We're really good friends." I always make it a point that people know how good friends me and Miles are. Everyone really likes him or they just don't get him. He's hard to graps but he's on of the nicest people you will ever meet. I look over and see him walking stiffly away over to the plastic knives and what not. He just is insecure around Kevin, I think.
Elisa stiffens all of a sudden, she's looking up ahead of her and all of a sudden I see Bennett Williams. He's not just walking by mindlessly like he always does- he's like a fucking movie star. Everyone around him is just white noise. He's smiling. Not at one of his friends or someone he knows. "Hey, Elisa," He says waving.
I look at her as Kevin looks behind himself. She touches her neck and smiles a little. "Hi," She says but instantly dives into a rosey shade of pink. He comes over to her.
"Did you get your tickets for Sunday Drive?"
My mind is exploding at amazing rates. Reason number one, Bennett Williams knows and is talking to Elisa. Two, she's answering him which means she knows him- because I've never seen anyone except for her stress the rule "don't talk to strangers." Three, he is talking to her about... drumroll, Sudnay Drive. This is a mirage or something.
She shifts looking over at me, and I'm still staring at her. She's a foot or two away from me. "No," She says- her voice tightening. "They sold out by the time I went to order them."
What show are they even talking about? He raises his eyebrows. "Are you serious?" He asks.
She nods, shrugging one shoulder. "I guess I'll just have to see them next time." She says softly.
He points behind him. "You know how I told you Jonah was ordering me a ticket?" He asked. She nods. What? They talk somewhat normally? Elisa Loren is probably the shiest and half-mute person you'll ever get a first impression of. She's talking to Bennett Williams and not even breaking much of a sweat because of him- more because of me. "Well, he got me one and then my other friend ordered me one too, so I was just going to bring someone, but if you want to go with us I could give it to you... I haven't promised it to anyone yet. I was nervous you didn't get one."
Then all of a sudden she brightens up. "Are you sure?" She asks. "I mean, it's okay with your friends if I go?"
"Jonah's obsessed with you," Bennett Williams says... my mind re-explodes. She knows his friends? What. The. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. She is basically planning a date with the hottest emo kid in the entire district and she's more newvous about me staring at her. I. am. fucking. oh. my god. "I don't think it's going to be a problem. Besides I was going to ask Sean who would have gladly shoved the ticket away anyways."
She smiles a little. "Okay," She says. "Yeah, that sounds great."
He smiles. "Cool," He says. "And I've been listening to the EP over and over again. It's incredible."
She smiles at him still. I look at Kevin who's waiting for me to notice him. I flash a finger quickly up for a minute to listen some more. "I'm in love with it," She says. Then she looks at me. I make eye contact with her. Then I look and see Bennett look at me.
"This is Cass," Elisa says quickly blushing again. "Cass this is Bennett."
Bennett Williams smiles at me. "I think I've met you before, you're friends with Miles right?"
"Yeah," I say in a high-pitched voice. He remembers me? I was practically fainting in his presence. How is Elisan not dead?
"Elisa's told me a lot about you," He says smiling. "It's nice to meet you again."
I smile and nod. "She hasn't said much about you," I say looking over at her quickly. "Nice meeting you again, too."
A kid jumps up next to him. "Hey there," The kid has glasses on and is tall and in a Saves the Day shirt. "How's my friend Eh-lisa?"
"Hi," She says quietly blushing again.
Bennett Williams sighs and peels the other kid off of his shoulder. "Sorry," He says. "I'll leave you guys alone. But yeah, we can talk later about the details..."
"About what?" The kid presses. Then he gets excited. Not normal excited. A loud hyper kidn of excited. He slams his hands down on the table. "No! You're coming to Sunday Drive with us?" He holds his hand out for a high-five that Elisa blushes again- because of me, I know- and gives him his high-five. "I told him to ask if you had a ticket, sick, now this is a good crowd."
Elisa smiles a little. "Yeah," She says says. She looks at Bennett. "Yeah, I'll see you later. Um, do you want me to send you what I have done on the project?" What project? The only class we have that would have Bennett Williams involved.... the Shakespeare project. I look at Bennett Williams who is smiling at her.
"Yeah," He says. "Send it tonight, and I'll send you the final copy for you to print out tomorrow."
"Okay," She says.
"You coming to see Bennett play at my house this weekend?" The other kid asks sitting down across from Elisa. Miles seems to have vanished but I look at the kid taking his place across from her. She shakes her head. "I can't." She says. "There's..."
"Come on," Bennett Williams tugs on the kids arm. The kid gets up. And keeps looking at Elisa.
"Shh," He says to Bennett Williams. He looks at Elisa. "I want you at my house," He says pointing at Elisa. "Fuck your boyfriend, Sean and Spinella says his band is complete shit anyways. You've missed him two weeks in a row." The kid points to himself. "Do me a solid, Elisa, come to my party get crazy drunk and make out with me."
Elisa shakes her head- strangely she doesn't blush. "I can't," She says. "I'll try and make it though."
Bennett Williams shakes his head. "If you have to see Nathan, go see his band. It's fine."
The kid points at Bennett Williams. "He'll just shit his pants if you come," He says. "He gets nervous easily. Just promise me you'll stop by for five minutes to hear him cover a Sunday Drive song and then you can leave."
Bennett Williams shakes his head and wraps his hand around the kids arm and pulls him away. "I'm sorry," Bennett Williams says sympathetically to Elisa. "He didn't take his meds today. But, hey, I'll talk to you later."
She smiles. "It's okay," She says. "Um, yeah, talk to you later." At that Bennett Williams drags his hyper friend away and Elisa bunches up her sandwich and bag into a ball and gets up quickly and rushes away from me. I look at Kevin.
"Excuse me," I say.
I follow her to the trash and then into the bathroom. She barely makes it to the stall. I grab her arm. "What was that?" I ask smiling.
She turns around defeated. "Please," She says quietly. "Don't make this a big deal. We just talk in English."
"And out of English," I point out. "You know his friends?"
She crosses her arms. "Please, Cass," She looks at me. What's wrong with me asking about her random weird friendship with The Bennett fucking Williams. "It's not a huge deal. One of his friends introduced themselves to me at Death Cab and then I hung out with him on Halloween-"
I stare at her. "I thought you ditched me to hang out with Nathan?" I said. She winces at the word 'ditched' but I can't say she didn't.
She touched her neck. "He ditched me," She said quietly. "And then Jonah and San were trick-or-treating and they invited me over... so I went."
I stare at her. "How long have you been friends with him?" I ask.
She thinks. "A month and a half," She says quietly. "But please, I don't want to get a hard time about this. And I don't want Nathan to find out."
I stare at her. "Why?" I ask.
She turns suddenly as Rachel Powers comes out of the stall. Her mouth is a tight thin line. It splits into a grin when she sees us. "Oh, hi, Elisa." She says. She goes to wash her hands. Elisa goes silent and looks down.
I don't know where to start asking questions. Elisa- who is in love with Nathan- doesn't want him to know about how she's friends with Bennett Williams. Elisa- perfect, pretty, smart, quiet Elisa- is hiding something from the love of her high school career. Then I start to think she's hiding something else.
"What," She says. "Do you like him or something?"
She gives me a look. "No," She says quickly.
Rachel walks out of the bathroom and heads into the cafeteria. Then Elisa turns to the sink and washes her hands for a minute. I stare at her. I feel like I barely know her. She is gone. She's so different. I hadn't even noticed. I look at her and she dries her hands on the thin paper towels balling them up and throwing them in the trash.
"I don't like him," She repeats to me. I look at her. I can tell. She does. I just know.
"Does he like you?" I ask.
She shakes her head silently. Then I start asking questions. They follow her to the lunch table and she tries to tell me as little as possible. Miles and Kevin are talking. There is an exchanging of looks between Elisa and Miles. "You knew?" I ask Miles.
"Yeah," He says hesitating looking at Elisa.
Kevin looks at Elisa suddenly. It's a weird look. It's the looks I see people give Bennett Williams. I start to get why she doesn't want people to know. I find myself looking at her in a new light all on my own. She's not the person I used to know.
The bell rings and she gets up. This is an Elisa Loren I don't know at all. But she's my best friend no matter what.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
"I'm Yours Tonight" The Academy Is...
Forever alone, until I found you
And now your always there
There's only your scent on my clothes
Oh, but when the sun exposes all my demons,
will you stay or run away?
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skiesI'm yours tonight
I'm yours tonight
Wherever you go,
they say I'm bad news
When everyone agrees,
Whispers start sounding like screams
Oh, but I know what you want
To say before the words escape your teeth
Will you just believe?
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skies
I'm yours tonight
I'm yours tonight
My good intentions,
can leave the hardest parts
The harshes scars you'll never see (you'll never see)
My bad impressions, oh they will follow me,
Making enemies that I can't see
Forever alone, until I found you
And I know that you'll stay
You won't run away
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skies
I'm yours tonight
I'm yours tonight
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skies
I'm yours tonight (I'm yours tonight)
I'm yours tonight
****
does this not scream bennett talking to elisa?
And now your always there
There's only your scent on my clothes
Oh, but when the sun exposes all my demons,
will you stay or run away?
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skiesI'm yours tonight
I'm yours tonight
Wherever you go,
they say I'm bad news
When everyone agrees,
Whispers start sounding like screams
Oh, but I know what you want
To say before the words escape your teeth
Will you just believe?
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skies
I'm yours tonight
I'm yours tonight
My good intentions,
can leave the hardest parts
The harshes scars you'll never see (you'll never see)
My bad impressions, oh they will follow me,
Making enemies that I can't see
Forever alone, until I found you
And I know that you'll stay
You won't run away
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skies
I'm yours tonight
I'm yours tonight
I'll help you find your way
Every moment your awake,
You know I'll stay
Even in your dreams
I'll pull the stars down from the heavens,
To fill your empty skies
I'm yours tonight (I'm yours tonight)
I'm yours tonight
****
does this not scream bennett talking to elisa?
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