"Islands in the Sun" Weezer

Hi

I'm trying to go back to my roots with my Kerrington-based stories. It's not that difficult. As you know, my obsession with The Academy Is... has grown more than any obsession I've ever had. And my respect for them is overwhelmingly manifesting inside of me, and will for a while now, but I'm finding the songs and moments in the middle of records where I dropped my album booklets and CD cases and grabbed my notebook and started writing. And/or stole records and listened to them online and opened word documents and started writing.

But I've found a lot of songs I've forgotten. With the new music coming out all the time and out there waiting for me, I'm finding more and more influences which is why the characters are changing and the ideas are moving onto new levels.

Rereading everything I've noticed two things 1) I have improved my spelling immensly (Spell Check) and 2) there is so much more to these stories than boy meets girl and boy falls in love before girl and they somehow end up together in an intoxicating love connection. There's substance and there's meaning. Which is much like a record.

Anyone can write cheesy hit songs. I mean... look at Taylor Swift. I could easily write a song like "Love Story" and I won't make as much money, but I could do so. Maybe not a hit song but one that compared to "Love Story." But what musicians strive for is just longevity and meaning and purpose. I'll have to face it, I will never be in a band. I will go to shows, support bands, love music for the rest of my life, but never will I be onstage playing in front of twenty emo kids or more playing music written by the people I share the stage with. I would give anything to do so, but I was given a silent voice. And I'll use that to make my art and my music.

As you can see, I'm positioning myself far away from books like Twilight and even my favorites. I'm reading as little as I can- which is awful and everything but, I'm trying to go back to whatever inspired me to sit back and make up these stories. I want these stories out there. I want to reach people and have then understand what I am when I read these stories as if they weren't even my own. I'm relying on music.

The relationships are inspired by songs.

ElisaxBennett

"After the Last Midtown Show" The Academy Is...

"Sunday Drive" The Early November

"The Brilliant Dance" Dashboard Confessional

"This Ruined Puzzle" Dashboard Confessional

"Steadier Footing" Death Cab For Cutie

"Winter Passing" The Academy Is...

"Last Place You Look" The Get Up Kids

"I'll Catch You" The Get Up Kids

"Nightingale" Saves the Day

"Forever Ended Today" Remember Maine

"For Me This Is Heaven" Jimmy Eat World

RainiexPaul

"Perfect Kisses" The Apathy Euology

"The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot" Brand New

"Just Another One" A Rocket To The Moon

"Automatic Eyes" The Academy Is...

"Play Crack The Sky" Brand New

"Don't Mess With Texas" Remember Maine

The bands the characters talk about and go see are what I've heard about by jotting down bandnames during interviews of my favorite bands, as you can see above. So right now I feel more like a silent musician making up for all my lost sound with all the words I can. And as hard as it is to be a part of this "scene" in the chunk of music I'm listening to it's goos to know I'm doing my best to fuel it and to open kids up to the music that influenced the major bands they listen to.

Fall Out Boy was majorly inspired by "Four Minute Mile" which is one of my favorite Get Up Kids records. The Academy Is... was influenced by bands like Saves the Day and GUK and Alkaline Trio.

To be in this scene theres always a band you test the waters with. And if you don't like it, you shrink back and say "You know what I'll go somewhere else," and don't jump into what can change your life someday. Being a music listener is not hitting pause the moment you hit a wall in your listening, it's about taking dives and letting yourself open up to other things.

I didn a quiz on Facebook. I didn't post it, it was a "Note" thing and you checked the boxes of bands you liked. Although the bands were all horribly misplaced I Xed all the bands I liked. And unfortunatly my score was low. I feel less bad knowing half of the stuff on that list was a load of crap and that Gym Class Heroes was under indie(?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!? COMPLETE JOKE?!?!?!!? Yes.)

But then again I listen to things nobody knows about. I'm used to standing up in front of my English class with maybe three or two people who actually know a little bit about my music and what not, and saying "This Band is called Empires, and I'm assuming nobody knows who they are..." Overwhelmingly the answer was 'No, who the fuck's Empires?' In this "scene" called "emo music" it's so open and wide and broad. It's weird to say I expect this band I knew about since a month after they started is on the back cover of Altenative Press Magazine and people are asking ME if I know who they are.

I already feel older now with all these little bands I know blowing up and the bands I fell in love with withering away. I can't back-sass Paramore nor can I ever repeat the sentence "William Beckett is a girly anorexic toolshit" because these bands shaped me. They opened me up to the CDs in my library that never seemed to exist in my life when I was rocking The Early November back when I was 12 and wearing only clothes from those brand-obsessedteenybopperstores.

But what I create is coming from all those places. Who knows. If I hadn't jumped into this world of "emo" music I may be writing Clique books about all the shitty girls I have to deal with in my life.

But here I am. Ranting about music downloading what could have been my iPod Favorties Playlist had my sister never met a girl named Rachel who sent her a song by my good friend Ace Enders. Or had I bough Justin Timberlake over All-American Rejects with my fifteen dollar Target Giftcard from my grandfather.

This world is a new place. We as people are too naive to understand that what we need to do is live and live lifestyles where we won't get what we want but we will be happy. Less work work work. More breathe love live.

*Sigh* and so I return you to your normal life and I to mine. I have to say, I'm embarrassed my sister will be playing this music I'm downloading tomorrow at her Swee 16, though I have snuck in various goodies for myself like Cobra Starship, The Academy Is... and 3OH!3 jams I dance to all the time, but at least I'm getting money for this. I'm saving up this time.

J-Z Ray